Online Dating Advice For The Desperate and Dateless

Oasis Active – Review

Oasis Active is a huge free dating site that started in Australia and has now branched out into other countries. If you live in Australia you may have seen this ad:

I have been a member of this particular sight for about four years and have had some success. It is simple and allows quick, free chat with members however there are also many cons. So daters let’s weigh it up.

Pros:
* It’s free
* You can limit searches by location
* It has a chat function so you can monitor how much personal information you give
* You can contact people immediately
* It has a list of all your chat contacts which you can order by who is online
* It has live activity updates

Cons:
* It’s full of advertising (the trade off for it being free)
* The chat function is clunky and the chat panes block your viewing pages
* It is hard to delete people from your contact list en masse.
* You have to send a message when you contact or deny a person’s contact request that comes from a very limiting list
* It gives you extensive lists of matches based only on the most basic strictures, meaning it doesn’t take into account interests or values.
* If you are someone who likes to look at personal pages a few time it will show up in the other persons activity feed.
* It’s full of pervs and bots (you will run into more bots if you are looking to date women and pervs if you are a bisexual or lesbian woman)

Furthermore to that last point here are some excerpts from real conversations I have had, all before a hello was said:
“I am married but I was wondering if you wanted some sexy fun”
“My boyfriend and I are looking for another woman  to join us”
“Will you punish me mistress?”
“I am looking for a wife”
“What is your hotmail address”
“Want to see me cum on cam?”

Oh yes my dears all of the archetypal jerks that exist on craigslist exist here too.
These are just a few examples, there are hundreds more. Which brings me to a few tips:
1. Be discerning about who you allow to talk to you
2. If there are things you really don’t like in a partner be sure and state that in your profile
3. Pictures get you a lot more hits
4. As always take my tips on setting up your profile and be careful when deciding to meet people you’ve talked to

Rating: 2.5/5

As always my little daters, have fun, be safe and find love and until next time,

Later Dater!

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For those of you not familiar with Craigslist, here’s a quick run down. It’s basically pre-ebay online selling. E-classified if you will. As such there is a personals section. Now although most of these are for “NSA” (No Strings Attached) encounters but you can often meet a lot of interesting new people by putting ads up on this site especially for women who seem to have a lot of respondents. Within one day of putting my ad up on Craigslist Melbourne I had over 20 different replies and at least 3 viable respondents I would look at talking to further.
Before I get into pros and cons of this site I should categorize the four main types of respondents you will most likely get to any relationship ad. Please click pictures to see full size.

1. The Creepy Creeperton
Ok so the first type of respondent to any Craigslist ad is the creepy guy. The creepiness could be anything from vividly describing everything they want to do with you, the life he wants to build with you and every deep dark secret he has, he develops crushes way too quickly and you have a sinking suspicion he has an ulterior motive.

Seriously, WTF...

And sometimes they have seen previous posts or you’ve answered theirs and they get a little clingy….

Sooo clingy

2. The Crazed Sex Maniac
This person takes many forms, from casually slipping sex into the email and hoping you don’t notice……

Wow.... just wow...

 

To the married guy hoping to get something on the side…..

Oh dear

Sometimes they tell you in vivid detail what they want but I will spare you that picture…

3. Genuine Replies
Sometimes, just sometimes you will get a guy that has a genuine reply, sometimes they are a bit old or there’s something else you don’t like but you have to gie them credit for replying.

PROS:
It is free
It’s local so you can choose where you want to post it
You meet a lot of interesting people
Fast turn around on replies
Anonymous unless you reply

Cons
You get a lot of creeps
You have to sift through a lot of replies
If you reply you have to give them your email address (though you could make an account specifically for this purpose)
You sometimes get scammers

Overall Rating: 3/5

LATER DATERS!!

Hello there poppets, Madame Stacey here. It’s time to dole out the advice for all of you love-starved, desperate and dateless lonely hearts out there! Just kidding, but seriously, any 21st Century girl or guy knows that is you want to meet that special someone, or make new friends in the privacy and comfort of your own home, then online dating is the way to go.

There are a myriad of site out there, from free and casual sites for the casual dater, to serious, membership paying, psychologically dissecting sites for the serious dater. However any discerning patron of these sites will tell you that there are a minefield of dos and do nots associated with this form of dating. Any of these could be the reason you aren’t getting hits on your profile and that’s where I come in.

Ok so you are a first timer or looking to tune up your profiles, you’ve chosen the site you want to use based on your needs and you are ready to dive in head first! You start entering your details and you get to the part that says nickname.

At this juncture you really have 2 choices, use the screen name you use for everything or make one up on the spot. Both of these have pro’s and con’s and either can be acceptable.
For example a name you use for everything will be easy to remember, however if it’s something like WeedSmoker92, you may want to reconsider.

Ideally you want the name you choose to say something about you, but not too much.
Here are some real life examples of do nots and why you might want to steer clear.

The DON’TS

The Overtly Sexual Screen Name
The overtly sexual screen name gives off an air of creepitude right off the bat, any experienced online dater will tell you that this guy is on this site for one reason and one reason only and it isn’t a picnic in the park. Even if you are going for that, try not to make it as obvious as a slap in the face. Also irony doesn’t come off well in print so if you are using it for this purpose, save it for your chat conversations.
Real life examples include:
Aussie4play
Hot4U99
Teletubbiessextoy
SexKitten20
PantyGirl

The I-Love-Me Screen Name
For me there is nothing worse than a man or woman who loves themselves and thinks you should too. This comes across in screen names often times that can range from emphasizing physical traits to just flat out saying you are awesome, you may be all those things but they are best left to your profile page where you can explain why.
Some real life offenders include:
cutie444
cuiteblueeyes
smexiiboy
hotaussieguy14
FriendlyGuy
AwesumGuy

The Misspelled Screen Name or The To-Many-Numbers Screen Name
These two come under the same category because they are both small annoyances that the discerning man or woman might overlook you for. Having to use numbers, particularly a lot of numbers, means you lack originality because, as is the case with cutie444, there is probably 444 other people who think they are cute enough to use that as their screen name. Likewise misspelling can also be a sign of this or worse a sign that this person cannot spell simple words.
Real life perpetrators are:
benny5000
rhysl83
cruiswitme
johns1234
stuuupid

The DO’s
The list of things that make up a good screen name can usually be found together, depending on taste a good screen name can mean many things. I like to see succinctness, humor and originality and if you have these traits your screen name is a good place to show them off.
Some screen names I liked are:
trentsagoodname
LoveAlbatross
SereneMaelstrom
pedrotheswift
ImaDinosaur
MeandIandMyself


Remember the screen name is the first port of call for anyone viewing your profile but don’t obsess over it. If all else fails just pick an obscure word from the dictionary and go with it (though make sure it’s not some horrible disease) have fun and be eye-catching.

Well that’s about all from me so until next time,

LATER DATER!